Too Pretentious and ‘try-hard’???

Ehy (I mean Hey haha that’s how frazzled I am)

Had a thought lately, well had a few but I’ll save others for more blog posts. I do a few co-corriculars and lately had a few philosophical thoughts; I think It’s a bit weird but I do this court thing called Mock Trials and yes, its a lot of hard work, but maybe too much, maybe I’m not cut out for it. Like I’m an ok Public Speaker, (someone once told me I sounded like David Attenborough :/ ) I panic and then forget everything. I knew my witness statement all 2 pages of it of by heart, I was learning it for weeks and then when I got up there It felt like it fell to pieces. I managed to get it out with that I-want-and-need-to-die feeling and I just felt terrible. Apparently I did the cross-examination well, and to be honest I think so too but that’s only because I’m good at arguing! Then all on top of that living ages away and feeling like I’m being humiliated by everyone especially the people who run it, It’s just a hassle and yes I enjoy the competitiveness but I’m not wanted there. I’ll do it once more, asses the situation, ignore the humiliating, pretentious, narcissistic idiots and Just carry on and do it for no one else but myself!

That’s my advice for you: Do something for yourself and for once ignore all the terrible feelings and comments that you subconsciously feel like your getting and enjoy it!

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